Saturday, July 16, 2005

Kinky Pinky

What a relief. Vanessa's gone from the Big Brother house. Obviously I'd rather have seen the back of Orlaith (we've already seen enough of her front), but if you can't get rid of someone who insists on tweaking her own nipples in public, second choice has to be a biscuit obsessive who pronounces 'things' as 'finggth'.

Personally I've always been of the opinion that anyone who continually uses the phrase 'Big Bruvvahh' is a nasty piece of work (an opinion I've held since being introduced to Marco last year), so I never warmed to Vanessa, particularly as her mode of speaking varied depending on whether she was in the diary room, sitting on the sofa on eviction night, or happily bitching in the loft. The more TV exposure she thought she was getting, the more she turned her 'th's to 'f's and started lisping.

It's probably just as well she's gone though - another couple of weeks and she'd have eaten the other contestants out of house and home. She even happily wolfed down Science's spaghetti bolognese with orange and lemon, which takes a certain amount of nerve. Although she wouldn't touch Kemal's Mongolian Coconut Cake, so clearly the girl has limits.

Ultimately though, Vanessa's biggest crime was to go into the house claiming to be the loudest person in Britain, and then spend seven weeks eating, sleeping, and generally blending into the background. I've worn louder t-shirts. So it was the end of the road for Kinky Pinky, and after 50 days in the house, finally time to hang the wallpaper.